Tag: shadow

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Carl Jung: Individuation

….and the Empath’s Road Back to Their Authentic Self

“When someone’s shadow is reflected back through another person’s clear perception, the unconscious mind has two choices: integrate the shadow or attack the mirror. Jung documented this pattern repeatedly in his clinical work. The person who sees clearly gets blamed for creating the problems they’re merely observing.“ ~Carl Jung

This creates what Jung called the scapegoat phenomenon.

The Scapegoat Phenomenon courtesy Bing Images

In the case here…I was merely observing the lies-and-deceptions of non-dual teachers, which I was giving-a-pass to in the name of spiritual ‘evolution’ and ‘Freedom’ when, later, non-dual teachers would make the agreed-upon decision…across the FULL non-dual teaching spectrum (including Nome, Russell Smith, Candace O’Denver, Adyashanti, Gangaji, Jeannie Zandi and many others)…to place the ENTIRETY of the burden for their lies-and-deceptions on these shoulders…and the shoulders of my family.

That criminal decision made it virtually impossible for me to be myself. Some called it a ‘Soul murder’ akin to being ‘buried alive.’

“Individuation is the courage to be oneself.” ~Carl Jung

“Highly perceptive individuals often become the designated problem in every group they enter, not because they cause problems, but because they reveal problems that already exist in the collective unconscious. Jung observed: “The bearer of superior perception becomes the repository for all that the group cannot consciously acknowledge about itself. This pattern explains why these individuals don’t just feel misunderstood, they feel systematically targeted by a force they can’t rationally explain.” -Carl Jung

In the most recent months of my healing journey, I began to piece-back-together the “Soul fragmentation” that was a result of having been silenced (under a death threat) and isolated at the hands of non-dual teachers. When those teachers made their decision to scapegoat me I was silenced (under a death threat) for a decade+…to ensure those lies would never never become public knowledge. This criminality has been described as a ‘Soul murder’ akin to being ‘buried alive.’ Those are absolutely accurate descriptions of the feeling of what occurred here. There has been zero accountability and no one who said “this is not right.”

It would be the Jungian teachings…along with the understanding of Evolutionary Astrology which Jung, also, intuitively understood and adhered to… that provided some of the deepest-and-clearest answers as to “why?”

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⚛️ The Mystery of Past Lives:  https://leslieread.substack.com/p/the-mystery-of-past-lives

“What really happens when you, finally…perhaps after lifetimes…begin to love yourself?”

According to Carl Jung, self-love is not a mindset or a motivational habit. It is a psychological transformation that restructures your entire relational world. You no longer accept certain behaviors; you establish boundaries where, before, there were none AND this new energy frequency repels some people/things/situations and newly attracts others who are more in alignment with your current, evolved vibrational energy.

As is often-the-case, an unexpected catalyst arrived in this life…one that would ultimately demand my own self-respect and self-love.

In this life, individuation would be unexpectedly-and-intensely catalyzed through a connection with a man I was deeply attracted to. This man was very adept at tantra: in this case, a tantra used for emotional manipulation (one could call that ‘toxic tantra’ – a deeply controlling drug-like sexual method that, I intuited, was directed by Gangaji and Eli Jaxon-Bear, during this man’s visit to Ashland). It turned out this was a man who also knew of my former teachers and of what occurred at their hands. With the connection to this man those teachers were hoping for a ‘sexual awakening’ upon which they would, then, restore my estranged family which Nome had restricted. (In certain cultures and spiritual traditions, the manipulation of families was often used to force certain spiritual outcomes.)

Obviously this man was not being forthcoming-and-honest with me about the connection with those teachers…or anything else in his life.

That betrayal ultimately forced-my-hand and re-organized the entirety of how I looked at myself, my world, my truth and The Universe.

In this profound sense, that man was an evolutionary catalyst and ultimate Blessing in this life.

Up until this point, I had been led to believe, especially in the non-dual teachings I was involved with for over 20+ years, that to deny oneself is the way to spiritual freedom. The standard ego-diminishment approach of radical, transcendent-addicted non-duality.

No doubt that radical approach to transcendent awakening can work (depending on what you consider ‘awake’) especially in an airtight, insular environment where there has been an establishment of “complete trust.” I saw this approach be successful with a handful of friends who, then, looked horrified as they could, finally, see what I had been forced to hold for years.

For many years, I felt that my trust and devotion was, certainly, strong enough to withstand such a complete ‘erasure.’

That was until that trust would be completely betrayed beginning with the ‘character assassination’ and numerous instances that culminated in Russ stating (in a taped session) that “we had to pick someone” indicating that I would be sidelined out of “Sudden Awakening” as I would be, ultimately, at SAT several years later. This sidelining was ALL due to seeing through the lies of these teachers.

⚛️ Character Assassination: https://integrityintruth.com/clarification-of-videos/character-assassination/

⚛️ The Existential Danger of Radical Non-Duality: https://leslieread.substack.com/p/the-existential-danger-of-radical

The connection with this catalyst man forced the unspoken ultimatum of a profound Love…but only if I would continue to:

– betray myself

– betray my family and

– betray the truth of a situation.

It was a betrayal SO UTTERLY COMPLETE: asking me to uphold the lies of non-dual teachers…to succumb to the very real occult (via siddis) manipulation of my family and to uphold a patriarchal, transcendent teaching that I no longer believed in as being the liberating teaching. All of those, together, was something I could NOT do.

It would take me many months of back-and-forth and for my conscious understanding to seep down in to exactly what my Soul was demanding. I was intensely attracted to this man and was, at that point, emotionally starved from the existential restriction of an ‘auric block’ which restricted all relations, primarily intimate relationships, for obvious reasons.

Over the following months, noticeably beginning around June of 2025, I began to see the actual play of this unconscious attachment…and how my connection to this man was being weaponized by non-dual teachers to ensure their lies and deceptions would never become public knowledge. My former teachers, no doubt, felt my empathic over-giving, people-pleasing nature would continue in her self-betrayal…especially as I had been blocked and surveilled (via ‘auric block’ and ‘psychic implant’) from relations, primarily intimate ones, for over a decade…a block that would affect every single area of my life: mental, emotional, physical, spiritual, financial, familial etc.

It was the connection with this man, who touted his own self-love…as any proud Leo is apt to do (!)…that began to catalyze my own journey of self-love, self-respect and, ultimately, back to myself. Slowly, I stopped negotiating my own self-worth for access-to-love and I stopped bargaining my unconsciously devalued-self and began to return to my own inner authority. Belonging, no matter who or what it’s to would never require you to betray yourself.

Finally, I stopped negotiating my self-worth for this man’s access.

When I finally decided “no more”…this man said “I don’t know if I should be glad or sad for you.” That was as close as he would ever get to being honest with me.

When I was forced, under threat for more than a decade, to be the “holder” for the lies and deceptions of non-dual teachers it became impossible to “become who I truly was.”

“Any belonging that asks us to betray ourselves is not true belonging.”~Brene Brown

Self-betrayal is the empath’s learned survival strategy and mechanism. This was, absolutely acknowledged by Nome…indeed, he would rely on my compliance to ensure the corruption in the non-dual space would never become public knowledge.

The empath learns to bargain their Soul and soften their boundaries in order to become acceptable.

This was definitely reinforced in the non-dual path…as it is in many traditions.

“Boundaries are an act of selfishness” and “Victims are violent people.” ~Byron Katie

An interesting memory came up when I was contemplating this aspect of the empath: I remember exactly the moment of recognition by Nome, in the middle of a talk, when he acknowledged, in silence, the ‘spiritual’ aspect of my own propensity of over-giving, akin to the martyr complex in Catholicism. It was a moment of understanding regarding the mutual symbiotic relationship between the empath and the controlling doctrine involving lies and deceptions of this teacher.

It was about people who see everything others miss, and why this ability destroys them. In his clinical practice, Jung documented patients with what he called “differentiated perception.” Individuals who could read micro-expressions, sense hidden emotions, and perceive psychological patterns that escaped everyone else. They saw through social masks, detected lies instantly, and felt the unconscious tensions in every room. Jung called this discovery “dangerous” because these people consistently ended up isolated, exhausted, and unable to maintain normal relationships. ~Carl Jung

People began to disappear as I was growing into myself. Deep inside I knew this was/is no mistake. I could feel the profound inner re-alignment under way. For the first time in this life…and no doubt lifetimes…I was beginning to feel like myself. There would be the felt snapshots-of-perception when, interiorly, everything fell into alignment. This was a new sensation. As this Self began to become the center of my psyche, relationships…and everything else not in that same frequency…began to reorganize naturally. This feels to be the ongoing process of lifetime(s).

…a LONG time!

Thank you for following this journey of a Soul reclaiming herself. No doubt this is the path of many sensitive beings.

As I grow in my own process I will add posts of the Wisdom of Carl Jung as it pertains to the empath and the process of individuation. There are, currently, many videos that beautifully capture and animate the teachings of Carl Jung…especially regarding the psychology of the empath and the, oftentimes, arduous road to individuation and the role of the healed empath.

A couple examples:

“The empathic individuals inability to forgive emotional deception isn’t weakness. Jung would call it the Wisdom of the integrated Self… the ultimate act of psychological integrity.”

⚛️ “The one emotional mistake super empaths never forgive”… https://youtu.be/bOQzQiT15CY

⚛️ Why Empaths Who Stop Caring Become the Most Dangerous of All…(it’s never that we ‘stop’ caring!) yet this is a powerful video: https://youtu.be/xwALbIQayX4

Please feel free to contact me if you have any questions or would like to discuss an aspect of your own journey.

Warmly,

-Leslie@integrityintruth.com

⚛️ And on substack: https://substack.com/@leslieread/posts

Next up: The False Sense of Belonging…and other aspects, links and videos pertaining to Carl Jung and the liberating process of individuation.

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The Ultimate Demise of Fundamentalist Spirituality…

The Arrogance of Superiority

Hands-down, one of the stickiest issues for me in leaving the cult of radical non-duality was the one of superiority…and of barely being able to tolerate ‘others’ who were not anywhere near a similar path. The notion that we were the “chosen ones” had not only been a very large part of the unseen, subtle indoctrination but one that was, quite literally, embedded in my bones over the course of my 20+ years at SAT (The Society of Abidance in Truth). This dynamic was not only endemic to this cult but is seen playing out, similarly, in much larger cults, such as the Osho cult. While certainly not stated out loud, it was deeply implied that we were ‘The Chosen Ones’…Narcissism at its height.

⚛️ The Cult of Radical Non-Duality: http://: https://leslieread.substack.com/p/the-cult-of-non-duality

One of the biggest…and most fraught…downfalls of such arrogance is that this worldview lays the perfect ground for the justification of lies-and-deceptions. The fact that Nome and Russell Smith were/are serial liars is well-known in the non-dual community. The entire set-up of the organizations at Nome and Sasvati’s SAT (Society of Abidance in Truth), Russell Smith and Helga Schleiter-Smith’s “Way of Sudden Awakening” and Candace O’Denver and Russell Smith’s “Great Freedom/Balanced View” were/are ALL based on lies, deceptions and emotional manipulations of their followers.

These types of tactics are, in no way, confined to these teachers but are part of a broad-based aspect of functioning within many fundamentalist groups. The fact that these groups were/are “non-dual” is NO exception to this destructive and coercive dynamic.

One of the truly sad aspects, within my own experience, is knowing that there are, still, people at SAT who are subject to this arrogance of manipulation…some who are the very people Nome set-out to help: the Indians. Questions during Satsang by those who have ‘awakened’ (according to Nome’s definition) are staged-and-repeated by those same people.

To this day non-duality is hailed as the equivalent to the Teachings of The Christ and The Buddha whose teachings involved so much more than mere non-duality. There is a very definitive sense of right-and-wrong and ethical standards.

Many non-dual teachers, such as Leonard Jacobson, actually advertise their programs on this false equivalency to the Teachings of The Christ…as did Nome and Russell Smith. I had to point out to Leonard on one such thread that The Christ nor The Buddha would have ever given a pass to such actions as described in this letter: ⚛️ ASI LETTER (Assoc. for Spiritual ‘Integrity’) 03/06/2023 at the end of which is a link to a short recording (22 min.) detailing the occult controls over 4-generations of my family… to which Rick Archer said to just “walk away”…https://www.dropbox.com/s/hga3c7zpo1v973j/ASI%20Letter%2003%3A06%3A23.pdf?dl=0&e=1&fbclid=IwAR2hNCDCiHgzRQrXqce9WFFH5vgHGHoGlda3PUlGKT2n1qMuoFfoMadMbvs

The HUMAN side of this is that 4-generations of my family were involved in the fallout from the sweeping deceptions of these teachers. We’ve all seen that one can be awake to Wholeness and yet that, in no way, means one is free from shadow or is somehow a balanced and decent human.

When there is the arrogance of superiority there is no room for discussion.

“Non-duality has LONG had within its approach the trap of just another superiority view of “spirituality/being-ness.” Any “superior” approach, whether it’s Christian, non-dual, Buddhist, Hindi, Muslim, atheist, etc. has already chosen a slippery slope practice, and invites the opportunity for exploitation, control, judgement, and exclusion. If one hasn’t processed and cleared out their subconscious “psychological basement” of cultural, religious, and familial fear-based and limiting beliefs, one will be susceptible to being controlled or capable of being controlled by a variety of “monsters” in various religious, monastic, or political garb.” ~Judith Froemming

While I absolutely agree with Judith’s statement there are many who become entangled due to the unseen-and-controlling mis-use of siddis (occult powers) which so easily mimic The Divine. This was most certainly the case at SAT. One could have cleared out their “psychological basement” all they want and still get entangled with these unseen forces.

Mere non-duality is just that: it is wholeness. In the words of FaceBook friend Kim Rome referring to my description of ‘awake’ non-dual teachers she responded : “They are not awake. They are living in a transcendent reality that is marked by spiritual materialism and bypassing.”
The depth of this statement is deeply profound.

⚛️ The Rush to Transcendence…and the existential consequences: https://leslieread.substack.com/p/the-rush-to-transcendence

In many, if not ALL, ways…the teaching of non-duality is a teaching on self-betrayal.

In the Universal, on-going, law of as-above-so-below we are seeing play-out the arrogant superiority of fundamentalist, white Christian nationalism. So-much-so that the crosses being worn by all those in the Trump administration are beginning to burn-the-skin of those who wear them with the growing reveal of criminality, in many forms, but in a form most heinous: the cover-up of global child sex trafficking. Possibly the largest cover-up in the world of sex crime. ALL this emanating from the white, fundamentalist Christianity as spelled-out, in its entirety, in the document: Project 2025 and carried out by the man-behind-the-curtain and architect of the diabolical family separations: Stephen Miller. (link below).

⚛️https://static.heritage.org/project2025/2025_MandateForLeadership_FULL.pdf

⚛️ A Message on Our Core Values: https://leslieread.substack.com/p/a-message-on-our-core-values

As with all forms of superiority this, too, will crumble under its own weight…as we are beginning to see with our own eyes.

Thank you for following my work. 🙏

Please feel free to contact me with any questions or comments. ❣️🌷

Warmly,

-Leslie@ integrityintruth.com

⚛️ www.integrityintruth.com

⚛️ https://leslieread.substack.com/publish/posts/publish


The statement below accurately sums up the absolutist teachings of Nome, dismissing our Humanity as essentially unreal, where ANY action…even actions of criminality…will be covered-for by the fundamentalism of his teachings…until they aren’t!

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The Scapegoat Phenomenon…

Involving Sensitive Souls and Empaths

“When someone’s shadow is reflected back through another person’s clear perception, the unconscious mind has two choices: integrate the shadow or attack the mirror. Jung documented this pattern repeatedly in his clinical work. The person who sees clearly gets blamed for creating the problems they’re merely observing.“ ~Carl Jung

This creates what Jung called the “scapegoat phenomenon.” In the case here…I was observing the lies and deceptions of non-dual teachers, which I was giving-a-pass to in the name of spiritual ‘evolution’ and ‘Freedom.’

“Highly perceptive individuals often become the designated problem in every group they enter, not because they cause problems, but because they reveal problems that already exist in the collective unconscious. Jung observed: “The bearer of superior perception becomes the repository for all that the group cannot consciously acknowledge about itself. This pattern explains why these individuals don’t just feel misunderstood, they feel systematically targeted by a force they can’t rationally explain.” ~Carl Jung

In the most recent months of my healing journey, piecing back together the “Soul fragmentation” that was a result of having been silenced (under a death threat) and isolated…forced to carry the deceptions of non-dual teachers…it was the Jungian teachings that provided some of the deepest and clearest answers as to “why?”

The following piece describes to a “T” what I experienced at SAT (The Society of Abidance in Truth) and the resultant, deliberate ‘character assassination’ (what some have called a “Soul murder”) at the hands of Nome when non-dual teachers made the deliberate decision to place the entire burden for their lies and deceptions on these shoulders…and the shoulders of my family.

⚛️ Character Assassination: https://integrityintruth.com/clarification-of-videos/character-assassination/

⚛️ The Tangled Web of Deception: https://leslieread.substack.com/p/the-tangled-web-of-deception

⚛️ The Cult of Radical Non-Duality:https://leslieread.substack.com/p/the-cult-of-non-duality

⚛️ The Mystery of Past Lives: https://leslieread.substack.com/p/the-mystery-of-past-lives

⚛️ A Message on Our Core Values: As-Above-So-Below: https://leslieread.substack.com/p/a-message-on-our-core-values

⚛️ The Existential Danger of Radical Non-Duality: https://leslieread.substack.com/p/the-existential-danger-of-radical

-Gratitude Carl Jung, Peter Brouwer and Caravaggio Bolo, via Facebook, for the following text excerpt.

Jung’s most dangerous discovery wasn’t about mental illness. It was about people who see everything others miss, and why this ability destroys them. In his clinical practice, Jung documented patients with what he called “differentiated perception.”

Individuals who could read micro-expressions, sense hidden emotions, and perceive psychological patterns that escaped everyone else. They saw through social masks, detected lies instantly, and felt the unconscious tensions in every room. Jung called this discovery “dangerous” because these people consistently ended up isolated, exhausted, and unable to maintain normal relationships.

Not because they were unstable, but because seeing everything came with a psychological cost no one understood. Today, I’ll show you Jung’s most dangerous discovery about people who see everything, and why he believed this rare ability either destroys you or transforms you into something extraordinary. The case that revealed Jung’s most dangerous discovery began with a patient he described in his private notes.

A highly introverted intuitive type who came to him in 1913 during Jung’s own psychological crisis following his break with Freud. This patient, representing what Jung would later categorize as the rarest personality type, possessed what he called “undifferentiated intuitive perception”.

She could walk into any room and immediately sense the psychological atmosphere: who was lying, who was in emotional pain, who harbored secret resentments. Jung wrote: “The patient displays an extraordinary capacity for perceiving unconscious contents in others, but this faculty appears to cause her considerable distress rather than advantage. She couldn’t engage in small talk because she saw through every social facade.

She couldn’t maintain friendships because people felt exposed and uncomfortable around her. She couldn’t hold employment because her presence disrupted the collective unconscious agreements that keep groups functioning. Jung realized he wasn’t treating pathology. He was observing what happens when the unconscious becomes too conscious, when perception becomes too differentiated for social survival. He documented her describing people with startling accuracy.

She speaks of others as if she has access to their private thoughts and hidden motivations. When I verify her observations through careful questioning, they prove remarkably accurate. This wasn’t psychosis or delusion. This was consciousness so advanced it had become socially dangerous. But Jung discovered something even more disturbing.

Because this patient’s extraordinary perception seemed impossible to explain, therefore Jung began investigating what he would later term “participation mystique”, the psychological phenomenon where individuals with highly differentiated intuition become overwhelmed by unconscious contents from others. Jung wrote in his Red Book period notes:

There are those among us whose psychic apparatus is so finely tuned that they absorb not merely conscious communications, but the entire unconscious atmosphere of their environment. Modern research by Dr. Elaine Aron on highly sensitive persons validates Jung’s early observations. Her research shows that roughly 20% of people have heightened sensory and emotional sensitivity.

But Jung identified something more specific within his psychological typology: the introverted intuitive type, comprising roughly 1% of the population, who don’t just feel deeply, but perceive unconscious patterns with startling clarity. Jung observed that these individuals have what he called “differentiated intuitive function”,

Their brains process not just obvious social cues, but unconscious emotional states, repressed content, and psychological patterns that others cannot detect. They see the depression behind forced smiles. They sense the desperation beneath confident presentations. They feel the collective shadow that groups unconsciously agree to ignore. Jung wrote: “The danger lies not in the perception itself, but in the psychic isolation it creates.

When one sees clearly what others cannot or will not see, one becomes a mirror that society cannot bear to look into. This creates what Jung called “the problem of the superior function”, when your greatest strength becomes your greatest burden because it separates you from collective unconscious participation. But Jung discovered the real danger wasn’t the perception itself,

Jung wrote in “Psychology of the Unconscious”:

Nothing has a stronger influence psychologically on their environment and especially on their children than the unlived life of the parent. But he discovered this principle extended to all relationships. When someone’s shadow is reflected back through another person’s clear perception, the unconscious mind has two choices: integrate the shadow or attack the mirror. Jung documented this pattern repeatedly in his clinical work.

The person who sees clearly gets blamed for creating the problems they’re merely observing. His patients with differentiated intuition experience this constantly. When they would gently suggest that someone seemed troubled, that person would explode at them for being negative or creating drama. When they’d express concern about obvious problems, they’d be accused of being judgmental or manufacturing issues where none existed.

Jung realized this wasn’t coincidence, it was psychological defense. In “Memories, Dreams, Reflections” he wrote: “Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves. But for most people, it’s easier to attack the person reflecting their shadow than to examine what’s being reflected. This creates what Jung called the scapegoat phenomenon.”

Highly perceptive individuals often become the designated problem in every group they enter, not because they cause problems, but because they reveal problems that already exist in the collective unconscious. Jung observed: “The bearer of superior perception becomes the repository for all that the group cannot consciously acknowledge about itself.”

This pattern explains why these individuals don’t just feel misunderstood, they feel systematically targeted by a force they can’t rationally explain. But Jung’s most disturbing discovery was still to come, because Jung observed that overwhelming perception manifested differently in different individuals. Therefore, he identified four distinct patterns within the introverted intuitive type, each representing a different way of processing unconscious contents from others.

For this complete article please refer to my note over on Substack by the same title: ⚛️ The Scapegoat Phenomenon…Involving Sensitive Souls and Empaths. https://leslieread.substack.com/p/the-scapegoat-phenomenon

Thank you for following my work in the unfolding of a complex karmic SoulCycle. It is my hope that these writings benefit you on your journey. Please feel to write me with any comments and/or questions. ❣️🙏🌷

Warmly,

-Leslie@integrityintruth.com

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The Mystery of Past Lives…

and the profound pointing of intuitive astrology in the understanding of Karmic SoulCycles

“We can’t really understand our place in the universe without grasping the principle of evolution over lifetimes.” ~Alan Leo

My story has been one of a lot of sacrifice in knowing things that I could not talk about. In this life it was the knowing of the lies and deceptions of non-dual teachers…teachers who then silenced me (under threat) and isolated me for a decade+ to ensure those lies would never become public knowledge. This effectively placed the entire burden for those deceptions on these shoulders…and the shoulders of my family.

Would those lies, ultimately, become secrets that I keep forever, essentially, betraying my own life…and the lives of my family?

That was the single-most karmic lesson I had to answer in this life. And there was no other modality more helpful in digging myself out of this existential hole…a ‘grave’ that some have likened to a “Soul murder” akin to being “buried alive” resulting in what Carl Jung referred to as ‘Soul Fragmentation’…than intuitive astrology, otherwise known as Evolutionary Astrology.

Evolutionary Astrology has been attributed to both Steven Forrest and Jeffrey Wolf Green. Both have been deeply helpful on my journey. “We can’t make sense of the birth chart without giving credence to the conditions of prior lifetimes.” ~Steven Forrest (in interview with Chris Brennan on The Astrology Podcast: ⚛️ https://youtu.be/itkBygnVqtg?si=Zz11I5RNC82id5oc )

Before I go into a few details of the chart, there were a quite a few life circumstances, a few which I will describe, that point to prior lifetime(s) of spiritual suppression and oppression (and, possible, crucifixion). Intuiting that the birth chart represents the Soul’s navigating tool from that karma, the circumstances in this life pointed to a karmic SoulCycle recreating itself, in present-time, for the very purpose of resolve…should I ‘choose.’

Firstly…I am not an astrologer.

That said, and perhaps it was fate, I was extraordinarily blessed to have come in contact with a handful of intuitive astrologers who are deeply connected and ‘awake’ Cosmic readers. It is to these highly intuitive readers of the Cosmos that I am deeply indebted. I consider it a profound display of The-Grace-of-The-Universe that these astrologers crossed my path, at just the right moment.

It was the generosity of these connections, in combination with the modern-day astrology software, that enabled me to follow along with the intricate and complex language of the cosmos-in-motion and the connection of those planetary objects with the astrological map of my birth chart. Without these astrologers and the attending software, it would have been impossible.

As a young girl, in 2nd-4th grade there were profound spiritual experiences tied to a deep devotion to The Christ. This devotion, and full-on trust, was so deep that it would result in what is now commonly known as bliss, flow-states and experiences of manifestations. During this time, that devotion led me to attend church daily for several months after which I noticed certain disturbing inconguencies in what was being presented…even though the services were delivered in Latin!

Yet, it was never my family who placed such spirituality upon me. My mother was a divorced woman who had married my Catholic step-father. His roots were in a deeply religious family who were chased out of Austria by Hitler because his father was a religious writer. Because of their marriage my mother and step-father were essentially ex-communicated and, because of that, they never influenced me towards the church. In fact, my mother once exclaimed “If this is what your God is about, I want nothing to do with it (referring to the church).”

Thus, my experiences and participation in the church, at such a young age, were never due to a familial pressure or influence. The extraordinary pull was from some entirely different place.

Instead, it’s my feeling that my devotion to The Christ was from some ‘thing’…or some time…wholly different and un-nameable. That devotion would have HAD to have been from a prior lifetime.

This connection/devotion seemed to fade away as I entered middle and high-school, and although the manifestations continued I never thought they were out of the ordinary.

Fast forward to 1989 when I met non–dual teacher Nome. There was instant recognition, along with the perception of his occult powers (siddis), from day-one. These powers he rarely showed to others. My feeling, at the time, was that this was a teacher manifest similarly to what I had experienced as a young girl with The Christ.

Those who follow my posts know that I, ultimately, became the ‘holder’ for the lies of Nome, Russell Smith and Candace O’Denver…all ‘awake’ teachers looking to awaken others in this ‘Rush to Transcendence.’

(When shadow grows to God-like proportions and the Rush-to-Transcendence: ⚛️ https://integrityintruth.com/the-rush-to-transcendence/ )

There were several instances with these teachers that pointed to past lives. In a first private Nome stated, at the onset: “You are one blessed and graced individual.” I had no idea to what he was referencing.

Nome’s teaching was primarily one of renunciation and negation. ANY negation went entirely against everything I experienced as a young girl…where everything was included. Nothing was left out.

I expressed this to Nome in this private where he conceded and then said to “… welcome everything.” More importantly, he said I “must have renounced in a prior lifetime.” In the moment, that struck-a-deep-cord and made complete sense.

Throughout my 2-decade+ time with those teachers/teachings, the primary teaching was internal as I did not align with negation or renunciation of any kind.

Separately Russell, Nome’s brother, stopped me in the hallway near the SAT chai room and remarked upon my posture. I have slight kyphosis and scoliosis, which I never paid much attention to. He said this posture might be a response to a prior lifetime of shame and isolation. That, too, rang true.

Fast forward to somewhat more current times when, during “The Compression Years” (2013-2015), I would occasionally order a computerized astrological reading from the Steven Forrest website. I was always amazed at how accurate they were. It was during these years of deliberate isolation and silencing (under a death threat) that I could feel the truth…of even a report generated by the computer…as the geometry of the stars doesn’t lie.

(The ‘Compression Years’…of isolation and deliberate silencing (under a death threat) at the hands of non-dual teachers…in which Adyashanti played a key role: ⚛️ https://integrityintruth.com/clarification-of-videos/the-compression-years-2013-2015/ )

In 2016, I had a free 15 minute reading with intuitive astrologer Kristin Fontana. In that reading she said, from the get-go, that I had the same axis and houses which may have tied me to the time of The Christ…that I might have been there.

That, too, rang true.

Later, when I was deliberating deeply if-and-when-and-how I would release-the-information about the lies and deceptions that I had been forced (under threat) to hold Kristin suggested I meditate on the following profound question: “When you are no longer in the physical body, and you are looking back upon your life, what would your Soul have wanted you to do?”

That settled it.

In order to release and end this Soul Cycle…and free myself…I would have to regain my voice and exercise justice for myself, and my family.

As my understanding of astrology began to unfold for me…so, too, did the unfolding of my reporting on, not only, my former teachers but of the sweeping deception in the non-dual community that surrounded this “cosmic betrayal” – an apt description of sweeping betrayal by Matt Licata of what happened in this life.

(The Tangled Web of Deception: ⚛️ https://integrityintruth.com/the-tangled-web-of-deception/ )

“The principle of karma…extends lifetime-to-lifetime-to-lifetime…until we break the pattern. Your birth chart is your Soul’s lesson plan. Ergo, your birth chart represents everything ‘wrong’ with you… and how to fix it. There is humility…and the triumphant appearance of human potential.” ~Steven Forrest

I slowly began to understand some of the planetary influences…notably what played out with Pluto in Capricorn (top-down-authority) during the entire time I had been silenced since 2008. In my natal chart Pluto is in Leo 8th house in strong opposition to my Sun at 15° Aquarius.

Additionally, there is a grand-cross in my natal chart with female spiritual warrior archetypes: Eris and Black Moon Lilith both in aspect, respectively, to my mid-heaven and ascendent…and in strong square to the electric Uranus.

As Astrologer Pam Gregory has stated regarding these female archetypes: “Eris fights against elitism, against deception…and against injustice. Just like Black Moon Lilith…she is unrelenting in doing that. She is the warrior sister of Mars and reflects tremendous beneficial purpose for the collective. ERIS archetype: goddess of discord…the female awakener. She gives not a jot for consequences! She’s about Truth, integrity and waking people up so their needs are being heard.”

Henry Seltzer, who has written a book on Eris, stated: “Mars fights because he wants to and Eris fights because she has to.” (It’s Henry’s TimePassages Astrology software that has been SO helpful: ⚛️ https://www.astrograph.com/astrology-software )

While all these astrologers were/are deeply helpful there were some astrologers who were obviously concerned that I would spill-the-beans regarding the deceptions of non-dual teachers. In my view, that is being loyal to a dogma…and not to the truth, and, certainly, not to the complete independence and lack-of-bias of The Cosmos.

Truth-is-not-Truth where there is a lack of integrity.

So my reporting began.

As I began to dig myself out of the existential controls-over this-life The Universe offered an intuitive astrologer who generously posted free weekly updates via podcast. This astrologer’s extraordinary cosmic read on the energies would literally walk me out-of-the-ground of having been “buried alive” (an accurate description). Her name is Molly McCord. She exhibited no such loyalty to non-dual teachers that I had intuited from several other astrologers but gave deeply intuitive reads on the Cosmic weather and how it supported our “Individuation” (a Jungian term) which I might have, previously-and-mistakenly, equated with ‘ego.’

For actual awakened freedom some people may need to diminish their ego…for others, they may need to build their ego up!

My Chiron (the wounded healer) is in the 1st house challenging my right to even exist.

It was when I posted my birth chart for past-life suggestions that my Astrologer-Friend Shellie Enteen pointed out the South Node in my 9th house. On, even, quick-glance she said the following about my birth chart:
“This is your birth chart. Looks like the Sag rising with Chiron conjunct is that the Part-of-Spirit near the Galactic Center would make you crusade for truth in this realm. Also, your chart ruler is Jupiter and conjunct Mars and the north node in the third house would suggest these communications about spiritual matters and something you might be angry (Mars) about that felt like victimization (Pisces). But that is the evolutionary direction, whereas the south node Virgo in the 9th was the old lives of giving into a restrictive dogma through a spiritual teacher. Also Saturn in Libra there suggests this is karma to clear.”

“The most important single contribution of twentieth-century astrology is that astrology is not a map of one’s fixed destiny but is a potential map of the unfolding of the authentic, higher self.” ~Robert Hand, from the foreword of Liz Greene’s Saturn: A New Look at an Old Devil. This would be the job of this lifetime: the profound healing of my Saturn.

Of course, there is no clear-cut textbook explanation, but what you intuitively feel when looking at your own chart. The entire chart is karmic!!

“This deeper kind of astrology is high voltage work . It may have been our fate to experience certain things, but it’s our freedom in how we process it internally.” ~Steven Forrest

“Energy is neither created nor destroyed.” ~Albert Einstein… describing a core principle of physics and, as it turns out, of our Soul.

An interesting short video on Origen’s radical teaching that the Soul existed before birth: Your Soul Always Existed…https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hzwenvGNzSU

Thank you for reading…and following my work. Please join me for a full journey of my life through the cult of non-duality at Integrity in Truth .

-Leslie Read

And on substack: ⚛️ https://substack.com/@leslieread/posts

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The Rush to Transcendence…

About a decade+ into intense practice at SAT…and coming fresh off a retreat…I was going down-the-stairs to the basement dungeon where I packaged up book orders. I was beyond worried with how-on-earth I was going to do all the tasks that kept piling up. 

I was SO worried by the time I got down the stairs that I truly felt I would have a heart attack. 

Right then-and-there, I concentrated on the task in front of me and I instantly expanded out as pure Space…out to Pluto (and beyond) and became omni-present…I was the rock outside-the-door etc.

Shortly thereafter Nome calls the bookstore desk-phone and says “See? That wasn’t so hard!”

Unfortunately the story went downhill thereafter and I was segregated-out (via ‘character assassination’  ⚛️ https://integrityintruth.com/clarification-of-videos/character-assassination/ ) for knowing too much about the brothers…until, ultimately, I had to be asked to leave lest the Indians catch wind of what the brothers had done by way of concocting a very elaborate story. 

In the ensuing decade+ this life would see every.single.aspect destroyed, controlled and monitored. This was done via the siddha occult practices of “auric block” (for extreme relational control, notably intimate relations), “psychic implant” (for existential surveillance) and extreme familial manipulation via siddis (occult control) to ensure this non-dual fast-track-to-transcendence would never be interrupted.

Shortly before leaving SAT for good, after a Sunday Satsang and during the final mediation, that glimpse of space was experienced again…this time through a simple and naturally focused attention. Nome immediately looked at me as though I was, somehow, supposed to ‘grab’ that state and plunge into enlightenment! 

My feeling, in the moment, was that it felt as though all the teachers were on some kind of “race-to-the-finish-line’ and that they would do anything to ensure people “wake up.” 

Nome was greatly influenced by Osho/Rajneesh and, in many of the less-sordid ways, patterned SAT after Osho’s teaching and organization. 

David Solomon who was with Osho in Pune and Eastern Oregon and later had a close connection with UG Krishnamurti, talked about Osho’s Rajneeshpuram “experiment to provoke God” in a similar vein:

“I believe (Gurdjieffian) devices were used by him to possibly awaken a few at the expense of the many. About that I’ve been very vocal myself. Real crimes against humanity were committed in an effort to bring about “the New Man.” No bueno.” (Emphasis added).

As with everything hidden, we are now seeing some of the more sordid aspects emerge with the now-grown children who were victims of neglect and sexual abuse during Rajneesh puram times finally speak out.

The salient and prophetic words of Ken Wilber here are very apt:

“Unless you are on a path that includes not only ‘waking up’…but ’growing-up’ AND ‘cleaning-up’…all 3-in-one package…you are going to get f**ked!! You WILL end up in a bad, bad way because one of these is going to go sour. That is THE major, unfortunate, path that the majority of people end up taking… and they end up wasting a life.” Samadhi does not, of course, address (ANY) shadow elements…in some cases it makes it *worse* as there is pure dis-identification.”

⚛️ The Existential Dangers of Pure Dis-Identification: https://integrityintruth.com/the-existential-dangers-of-pure-dis-identification/

A deeply insightful comment by my friend David Bingham…

“…I would like to add that in this modern age the Neo-Advaitan tradition of the truth existing ultimately in the sphere of the non-dual (which is followed by so many, with so many esteemed teachers ) is a deeply flawed model of understanding of the nature of the human condition and its relationship with the Infinite.  It is a form of understanding which has an in-built tendency to deeply exacerbate illusions concerning the experiences of life and in turn to generate rigidities around its interpretation.  In doing so it has great potential to be harmful to the fundamental well-being of its adherents, all the more so because it dresses itself in the clothes of liberation. It is a false and incomplete freedom of the age.”

No doubt what has occurred in this life is arguably one of more horrific and existentially harmful examples of the harm that can occur when non-dual teachers have not done their own internal work. While this situation does not include the typical breaches of integrity commonly known as sexual manipulations (and is, most certainly, not making light of such) this particular situation is far more pervasive, insidious, systemic and disturbing (of Integrity) in its use of over-arching lies, deceptions, cronyism involving collusion and coercion and the extreme misuse of high-level siddis (occult powers).

This is, sadly, the case before adequate inner work.

The rush to transcendence…

The following is an example (albeit extreme) of what can happen when teachers do not acknowledge and confront their own shadow(s):

⚛️ The ‘Compression Years’…of deliberate isolation and silencing (under threat)…in which Adyashanti played a key role: https://integrityintruth.com/clarification-of-videos/the-compression-years-2013-2015/

⚛️ Coffee Lane and the many engaging in sweeping deception: https://integrityintruth.com/clarification-of-videos/coffee-lane-and-the-two-years-prior-to-moving-to-portland-december-2015-july-2018-%e2%9c%be/

⚛️ The systemic deception and collusion within the non-dual community: https://integrityintruth.com/systemic-collusion-in-the…/

⚛️ The systemic deception and collusion within the non-dual community: https://integrityintruth.com/systemic-collusion-in-the…/

⚛️ Paul Selig’s message that this ‘was not intentional to me’ yet the existential controls were most definitely intentional to me…and my family: https://integrityintruth.com/clarif…/the-move-to-portland/

⚛️ Letter to the ASI (Association for Spiritual ‘Integrity’): https://www.dropbox.com/s/hga3c7zpo1v973j/ASI%20Letter%2003%3A06%3A23.pdf?dl=0&e=1&fbclid=IwAR2hNCDCiHgzRQrXqce9WFFH5vgHGHoGlda3PUlGKT2n1qMuoFfoMadMbvs

Thank you for following my work. ❦

Please feel free to contact me should you have anything to share related to this content or any questions: ⚛️ Leslie@integrityintruth.com

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The Existential Dangers of Pure Dis-Identification…

In a private (taped) session with one of my teachers (Russell Smith) I was told I would “fall through the cracks.”

At the time I had no idea what Russ was referring to. But, now, so much is clear regarding the deceptions, lies, systemic collusion and the over-arching occult (siddi) controls of Nome, Russell Smith and Candace O’Denver…hugely aided by Adyashanti, Gangaji, Bentinho and so many others in the non-dual community colluding in what is, undoubtedly, one of the largest (although, certainly, not the only) of existential breaches among so-called teachers of “truth.” 

While non-duality is a Fact-of-The-Universe…there are far too many teachers, who at the moment of an ‘awakening…whether via teachers/Gurus, NDE’s, the breathe or their own innate Presence…see the enormous possibilities of teaching before there has been any thorough integration of such an awakening.

As Nome used to say ‘There’s nothing to integrate.’ 

That said it all. It is precisely from this dis-embodied…completely dis-identified state of Radical Non-duality…that we see the unfortunate prevalence of such breaches as existential harm and, paradoxically, the control-over-the-lives-of-others. 

One of the biggest dangers of teachings of the unreality-of-the-body…ASIDE -from-the-fact that the sacred Body, itself, is the most efficacious portal into the transcendence of such!…is that the body is the Seat of sacred Presence and grounded-ness. Being…untethered from the body… creates a myriad of dualities, some of the most unfortunate showing up in the ungrounded lives and teachings of Neo-Advaita (contemporary non-dual) teachings.

In the words of Ken Wilber:

“Unless you are on a path that includes not only ‘waking up’…but ’growing-up’ AND ‘cleaning-up’…all 3-in-one package…you are going to get f**ked!!

You WILL end up in a bad…bad way because one of these is going to go sour.

That is THE major, unfortunate, path that the majority of people end up taking… and they end up wasting a life.”

Samadhi does not, of course, address (ANY) shadow elements…in some cases it makes it worse as there is pure dis-identification.

No doubt what has occurred in this life is arguably one of more horrific and existentially harmful examples of the harm that can occur when teachers have not done their own internal work.

The systemic deception within the non-dual community: ⚛️https://integrityintruth.com/systemic-collusion-in-the…/


Paul Selig’s message that this ‘was not intentional to me’ yet the existential controls were most definitely intentional to me: ⚛️https://integrityintruth.com/clarif…/the-move-to-portland/


The role of Adyashanti: ⚛️ https://integrityintruth.com/systemic-collusion-in-the…/


Letter to the ASI (The Association of Spiritual ‘Integrity’): ⚛️https://www.dropbox.com/s/hga3c7zpo1v973j/ASI%20Letter%2003%3A06%3A23.pdf?dl=0&e=1&fbclid=IwAR2hNCDCiHgzRQrXqce9WFFH5vgHGHoGlda3PUlGKT2n1qMuoFfoMadMbvs


You are your own healer: ⚛️ https://integrityintruth.com/you-are-your-own-healer/


(Photo image taken with an iPhone X in NW Portland) ⚛️https://integrityintruth.com/photo-gallery/

Thank you for following this blog. Your interest is so deeply appreciated. ❣️❧

Please feel free to contact me should you have anything to share related to this content or any questions: ⚛️ Leslie@integrityintruth.com

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The Smokescreen of ASI Oversight

Enclosed…

In 2020 I wrote a letter to the ASI (The Association for Spiritual Integrity) describing the harm that had occurred in this life at the hands of certain spiritual teachers: Nome, Russell Smith and Candace O’Denver (who goes by various aliases).

The organization ASI (Association for Spiritual Integrity) was formed shortly after I began working on my own website: www.IntegrityInTruth.com.

The ASI provided a platform…an address…with which I addressed my concerns in a letter that detailed the existential harm to this life…and to the Truth. It was in the hopes of getting some support that I wrote this letter describing what is arguably one of the worst breaches in the awakening community.

(A link to the PDF of that letter appears at the end of this blog-post.)

Over time it became very clear that not only would no help be forthcoming but that there was inordinate cover-up and collusion for the very ‘story’ I was/am reporting on.

Shortly after writing that letter I started a private message thread with approximately 100+ people that I invited who were current FaceBook ‘friends.’

Of those 100 at least a couple dozen were/are currently acting teachers and others well known in the non-dual spiritual community.

Many well-known teachers were/are present on that thread as well as Rick Archer of BATGAP (Buddha at the Gas Pump) and

Ralitza Zaya Benazzo and Maurizio Benazzo, co-founders of SAND (Science & Nonduality Conference).

(At this time a separate letter explaining what had happened was addressed to Zaya and Maurizio. No answer was forthcoming.) Clairvoyantly I felt Zaya’s discomfort.

During the past couple of years, those on that private message thread bore witness to the unfolding of my deepening understanding of what had occurred and the nature of what, ultimately, looked like collusion and cover-up in the non-dual community.

Significantly, as I deepened in my understanding of the obvious collusion…people began to leave the thread.

While I appreciated the willingness to stay ‘on topic’ and not go down endless rabbit holes around abuse of power, eerily, there was an airtight silence regarding the harm I was describing among the folks that remained on the thread.

Why?

As the saying goes: Silence = Complicity

That silence became even more airtight as the enormity of the scope of collusion to cover for the existential harm to myself…and my family…became clearly evident.

Rick Archer…one of the founding board members of the ASI began pushing back on my reporting with the following gaslighting:

“All I’m saying to you Leslie is, this thing seems to dominate your life. Is it really your mission in life to bring these people to justice, or whatever you hope to do? How is that coming along? How long have you been at it and how much progress have you made?”

“I’m sure that these guys are putting much less attention on you than you are on them. That to which we give our attention grows stronger in our life. Want to get them out of your life? Stop giving them attention.”

In correspondence with me one person (who will remain unnamed) finally stated the unspoken obvious:

“…everyone plays dumb to maintain a whitewashed narrative — at your expense …(and) is lying about the same thing…”

Thank you for following this story and for your continued interest in seeing actual integrity in high-level spiritual teachings. ❦

Please email with any questions at: Leslie@IntegrityInTruth.com  

_________________________❦

Please use the following link to access the letter to the ASI. At the end of that letter is a link to a short (22 minutes) recording detailing the harm to 4-generations of my family.(There have been several editions of this letter…the factual meaning and substance remains entirely the same.)

https://www.dropbox.com/s/apmlmhd89jjwvig/ASI%20Letter%2003%3A04%3A23.pdf?dl=0

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Non-Dual Teachers: my view

Lit Poppy taken at night…during ‘The Compression Years’ with an iPhone 5
https://integrityintruth.com/clarification-of-videos/the-compression-years-2013-2015/

The following is in dialogue (March 21, 2022) with Scott Funkhouser (aka Scott Kiloby) and his recent comment to me: “You’ve become anti-teacher.”

My response: 

“You make an important point regarding teachers, in general, and especially those who are currently acting teachers. I am not anti-teacher. I am anti-teachers who lie. I am anti-teachers who take no responsibility for their actions…and who use the very teachings to gaslight those who are reporting on harm.

Most, if not all, of the teachers I have come across in person, including yourself, while they have subtly indicated a level of compassion regarding what I was forced (under threat) to hold for the better part of a decade there has not.been.a.single.acting.teacher who has stepped forth and said they definitively will not support lies, deceptions and a systemic corruption that includes collusion and cover-up involving: Nome, Russell Smith and Candace O’Denver, aka Ziji Rinpoche…cover-up, the full weight of which has landed squarely…and solely…on these shoulders.

So it’s not that I am ‘anti-teacher’ as much as I am not willing to put the safety of this life…and the lives of my family…at the hands of those who are obviously, if not subtly, lying directly to me.

Anyone who knows me would know that I have always considered a Teacher of integrity to be the most efficacious route to freedom.

I still feel that way.

Yet…point me to one teacher who has not known of my former teachers and of what occurred at their hands.

Just one teacher who has had the integrity to say…‘This is not right.’

Not even teachers who are deeply respected have said anything…which points to a systemic collusion.

As communication with Spirit has gotten clearer and clearer I am of the firm conviction that far too many seekers rely on teachers who are compromised, if for no other reason then for being merely in a body and carrying a certain amount of shadow that those very teachers may not even be aware of.

A subject that is far too extensive to broach on a comment thread.

Nonetheless…thanks for engaging me in this as it is deeply important not only for this life and the lives of my family but for anyone intent on awakening and utilizing any of the various teachers who are currently active.

Much love to you as well Scott…??❤️”

(Light of a Night-time Poppy…taken with an iPhone 5 in Santa Cruz, CA)

https://integrityintruth.com/clarification-of-videos/the-compression-years-2013-2015/

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What Would a Conscious Person/Community do…

…once there has been harm?

Would they cover it up? 

By now, many of who have followed this blog…and the published videos…know of the ‘information’ I’ve been forced to hold (under threat) for a decade…for the lies of certain spiritual teachers: Nome and Russell Smith of SAT (The Society of Abidance in Truth in Santa Cruz, CA) and Candace O’Denver, aka Candice Rinpoche of Great Freedom/Balanced View in Marin, CA.

Not only have my former teachers gone to the extent they have individually but they have also called upon the greater non-dual community…inclusive of many currently acting teachers…to join them in a system-wide cover-up.…all for the sole-purpose of keeping this ‘information’ from becoming public knowledge.

Much of my interaction within this community has involved being lied directly to…lies which I’ve been aware of for the entirety of this past decade. 

As long as I was willing to go along with those lies…betray myself and my voice…betray my family…and, essentially, betray Truth teachings, I was accepted and ‘loved’ in the online non-dual community.  The coercion to continue to hold those lies was/is very real.

As someone, with long-standing ties to SAT told me recently:  “…everyone plays dumb to maintain a whitewashed narrative — at your expense …(and) is lying about the same thing…”

It is this cultish support for lies…just as we are seeing in the greater body politic…that will ultimately surface.

The rallying around a cult-leader(s) in order to uphold lies is no different in these ‘high’-level spiritual teachings than is playing out on the collective/political scene.

They are the same exact dynamic.

*On all accounts it is authoritarian — and ultimately controlling — in nature.*

At what expense (our natural) awakening?

In 2018 I left the town of Santa Cruz to move to Portland in order to escape the over-arching controls over this life and the surveillance of my homes.

That move was not without consequences…some of which I cannot discuss on a public thread but which, overall, proved to be fraught with an enormous amount of psychic/occult pushback and control. 

It is no exaggeration that in the years since 2018 I have literally been stalked by high-level occult powers (siddis)…the intimidation of which was/is very real. 

My question to the non-dual community…and all awakening communities is: “What would you do once there has been harm?”

“If a man is a Jnani, he cannot utter a lie.”

– Ramana Maharshi

Thank you, always, for listening,

-Leslie Read

YouTube: Leslie Read

‘Information’ I Held: Video #10

(Blog post photo image: Frosted black grass…taken with an iPhone X in NW Portland)

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The Return to Love

The return to Love happens differently for each and everyone of us. There are as many paths to the heart as there are individuals.

As many know, by now, I was purposefully separated out by my former teacher, Nome, for being the ‘holder’ for their lies and deceptions that included the operations of two main organizations:

Nome and Russell Smith of SAT…The Society of Abidance in Truth, Santa Cruz, CA…and Candace O’Denver, aka Candice Rinpoche of Great Freedom/Balanced View, Marin, CA.

It was this separating out…and the resultant occult controls (including auric blocks and psychic implants) over this life… that caused a trauma preventing this heart from fully opening, as I had experienced earlier in my life.

Part of those controls included being silenced (under threat) for a decade. Silencing and isolation are both considered human torture in cultures around the world. Perhaps more so, for an extrovert Aquarian!

Now, it is the re-opening of this expression…and the reason for that expression: to uphold the integrity of Truth…that is the ultimate return, in this life, to Love. ❦

(Photo..the tender winter Helliobore…taken with an iPhone X in NW Portland)