Tag: integration

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Carl Jung: Individuation

….and the Empath’s Road Back to Their Authentic Self

“When someone’s shadow is reflected back through another person’s clear perception, the unconscious mind has two choices: integrate the shadow or attack the mirror. Jung documented this pattern repeatedly in his clinical work. The person who sees clearly gets blamed for creating the problems they’re merely observing.“ ~Carl Jung

This creates what Jung called the scapegoat phenomenon.

The Scapegoat Phenomenon courtesy Bing Images

In the case here…I was merely observing the lies-and-deceptions of non-dual teachers, which I was giving-a-pass to in the name of spiritual ‘evolution’ and ‘Freedom’ when, later, non-dual teachers would make the agreed-upon decision…across the FULL non-dual teaching spectrum (including Nome, Russell Smith, Candace O’Denver, Adyashanti, Gangaji, Jeannie Zandi and many others)…to place the ENTIRETY of the burden for their lies-and-deceptions on these shoulders…and the shoulders of my family.

That criminal decision made it virtually impossible for me to be myself. Some called it a ‘Soul murder’ akin to being ‘buried alive.’

“Individuation is the courage to be oneself.” ~Carl Jung

“Highly perceptive individuals often become the designated problem in every group they enter, not because they cause problems, but because they reveal problems that already exist in the collective unconscious. Jung observed: “The bearer of superior perception becomes the repository for all that the group cannot consciously acknowledge about itself. This pattern explains why these individuals don’t just feel misunderstood, they feel systematically targeted by a force they can’t rationally explain.” -Carl Jung

In the most recent months of my healing journey, I began to piece-back-together the “Soul fragmentation” that was a result of having been silenced (under a death threat) and isolated at the hands of non-dual teachers. When those teachers made their decision to scapegoat me I was silenced (under a death threat) for a decade+…to ensure those lies would never never become public knowledge. This criminality has been described as a ‘Soul murder’ akin to being ‘buried alive.’ Those are absolutely accurate descriptions of the feeling of what occurred here. There has been zero accountability and no one who said “this is not right.”

It would be the Jungian teachings…along with the understanding of Evolutionary Astrology which Jung, also, intuitively understood and adhered to… that provided some of the deepest-and-clearest answers as to “why?”

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⚛️ The Mystery of Past Lives:  https://leslieread.substack.com/p/the-mystery-of-past-lives

“What really happens when you, finally…perhaps after lifetimes…begin to love yourself?”

According to Carl Jung, self-love is not a mindset or a motivational habit. It is a psychological transformation that restructures your entire relational world. You no longer accept certain behaviors; you establish boundaries where, before, there were none AND this new energy frequency repels some people/things/situations and newly attracts others who are more in alignment with your current, evolved vibrational energy.

As is often-the-case, an unexpected catalyst arrived in this life…one that would ultimately demand my own self-respect and self-love.

In this life, individuation would be unexpectedly-and-intensely catalyzed through a connection with a man I was deeply attracted to. This man was very adept at tantra: in this case, a tantra used for emotional manipulation (one could call that ‘toxic tantra’ – a deeply controlling drug-like sexual method that, I intuited, was directed by Gangaji and Eli Jaxon-Bear, during this man’s visit to Ashland). It turned out this was a man who also knew of my former teachers and of what occurred at their hands. With the connection to this man those teachers were hoping for a ‘sexual awakening’ upon which they would, then, restore my estranged family which Nome had restricted. (In certain cultures and spiritual traditions, the manipulation of families was often used to force certain spiritual outcomes.)

Obviously this man was not being forthcoming-and-honest with me about the connection with those teachers…or anything else in his life.

That betrayal ultimately forced-my-hand and re-organized the entirety of how I looked at myself, my world, my truth and The Universe.

In this profound sense, that man was an evolutionary catalyst and ultimate Blessing in this life.

Up until this point, I had been led to believe, especially in the non-dual teachings I was involved with for over 20+ years, that to deny oneself is the way to spiritual freedom. The standard ego-diminishment approach of radical, transcendent-addicted non-duality.

No doubt that radical approach to transcendent awakening can work (depending on what you consider ‘awake’) especially in an airtight, insular environment where there has been an establishment of “complete trust.” I saw this approach be successful with a handful of friends who, then, looked horrified as they could, finally, see what I had been forced to hold for years.

For many years, I felt that my trust and devotion was, certainly, strong enough to withstand such a complete ‘erasure.’

That was until that trust would be completely betrayed beginning with the ‘character assassination’ and numerous instances that culminated in Russ stating (in a taped session) that “we had to pick someone” indicating that I would be sidelined out of “Sudden Awakening” as I would be, ultimately, at SAT several years later. This sidelining was ALL due to seeing through the lies of these teachers.

⚛️ Character Assassination: https://integrityintruth.com/clarification-of-videos/character-assassination/

⚛️ The Existential Danger of Radical Non-Duality: https://leslieread.substack.com/p/the-existential-danger-of-radical

The connection with this catalyst man forced the unspoken ultimatum of a profound Love…but only if I would continue to:

– betray myself

– betray my family and

– betray the truth of a situation.

It was a betrayal SO UTTERLY COMPLETE: asking me to uphold the lies of non-dual teachers…to succumb to the very real occult (via siddis) manipulation of my family and to uphold a patriarchal, transcendent teaching that I no longer believed in as being the liberating teaching. All of those, together, was something I could NOT do.

It would take me many months of back-and-forth and for my conscious understanding to seep down in to exactly what my Soul was demanding. I was intensely attracted to this man and was, at that point, emotionally starved from the existential restriction of an ‘auric block’ which restricted all relations, primarily intimate relationships, for obvious reasons.

Over the following months, noticeably beginning around June of 2025, I began to see the actual play of this unconscious attachment…and how my connection to this man was being weaponized by non-dual teachers to ensure their lies and deceptions would never become public knowledge. My former teachers, no doubt, felt my empathic over-giving, people-pleasing nature would continue in her self-betrayal…especially as I had been blocked and surveilled (via ‘auric block’ and ‘psychic implant’) from relations, primarily intimate ones, for over a decade…a block that would affect every single area of my life: mental, emotional, physical, spiritual, financial, familial etc.

It was the connection with this man, who touted his own self-love…as any proud Leo is apt to do (!)…that began to catalyze my own journey of self-love, self-respect and, ultimately, back to myself. Slowly, I stopped negotiating my own self-worth for access-to-love and I stopped bargaining my unconsciously devalued-self and began to return to my own inner authority. Belonging, no matter who or what it’s to would never require you to betray yourself.

Finally, I stopped negotiating my self-worth for this man’s access.

When I finally decided “no more”…this man said “I don’t know if I should be glad or sad for you.” That was as close as he would ever get to being honest with me.

When I was forced, under threat for more than a decade, to be the “holder” for the lies and deceptions of non-dual teachers it became impossible to “become who I truly was.”

“Any belonging that asks us to betray ourselves is not true belonging.”~Brene Brown

Self-betrayal is the empath’s learned survival strategy and mechanism. This was, absolutely acknowledged by Nome…indeed, he would rely on my compliance to ensure the corruption in the non-dual space would never become public knowledge.

The empath learns to bargain their Soul and soften their boundaries in order to become acceptable.

This was definitely reinforced in the non-dual path…as it is in many traditions.

“Boundaries are an act of selfishness” and “Victims are violent people.” ~Byron Katie

An interesting memory came up when I was contemplating this aspect of the empath: I remember exactly the moment of recognition by Nome, in the middle of a talk, when he acknowledged, in silence, the ‘spiritual’ aspect of my own propensity of over-giving, akin to the martyr complex in Catholicism. It was a moment of understanding regarding the mutual symbiotic relationship between the empath and the controlling doctrine involving lies and deceptions of this teacher.

It was about people who see everything others miss, and why this ability destroys them. In his clinical practice, Jung documented patients with what he called “differentiated perception.” Individuals who could read micro-expressions, sense hidden emotions, and perceive psychological patterns that escaped everyone else. They saw through social masks, detected lies instantly, and felt the unconscious tensions in every room. Jung called this discovery “dangerous” because these people consistently ended up isolated, exhausted, and unable to maintain normal relationships. ~Carl Jung

People began to disappear as I was growing into myself. Deep inside I knew this was/is no mistake. I could feel the profound inner re-alignment under way. For the first time in this life…and no doubt lifetimes…I was beginning to feel like myself. There would be the felt snapshots-of-perception when, interiorly, everything fell into alignment. This was a new sensation. As this Self began to become the center of my psyche, relationships…and everything else not in that same frequency…began to reorganize naturally. This feels to be the ongoing process of lifetime(s).

…a LONG time!

Thank you for following this journey of a Soul reclaiming herself. No doubt this is the path of many sensitive beings.

As I grow in my own process I will add posts of the Wisdom of Carl Jung as it pertains to the empath and the process of individuation. There are, currently, many videos that beautifully capture and animate the teachings of Carl Jung…especially regarding the psychology of the empath and the, oftentimes, arduous road to individuation and the role of the healed empath.

A couple examples:

“The empathic individuals inability to forgive emotional deception isn’t weakness. Jung would call it the Wisdom of the integrated Self… the ultimate act of psychological integrity.”

⚛️ “The one emotional mistake super empaths never forgive”… https://youtu.be/bOQzQiT15CY

⚛️ Why Empaths Who Stop Caring Become the Most Dangerous of All…(it’s never that we ‘stop’ caring!) yet this is a powerful video: https://youtu.be/xwALbIQayX4

Please feel free to contact me if you have any questions or would like to discuss an aspect of your own journey.

Warmly,

-Leslie@integrityintruth.com

⚛️ And on substack: https://substack.com/@leslieread/posts

Next up: The False Sense of Belonging…and other aspects, links and videos pertaining to Carl Jung and the liberating process of individuation.

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The Scapegoat Phenomenon…

Involving Sensitive Souls and Empaths

“When someone’s shadow is reflected back through another person’s clear perception, the unconscious mind has two choices: integrate the shadow or attack the mirror. Jung documented this pattern repeatedly in his clinical work. The person who sees clearly gets blamed for creating the problems they’re merely observing.“ ~Carl Jung

This creates what Jung called the “scapegoat phenomenon.” In the case here…I was observing the lies and deceptions of non-dual teachers, which I was giving-a-pass to in the name of spiritual ‘evolution’ and ‘Freedom.’

“Highly perceptive individuals often become the designated problem in every group they enter, not because they cause problems, but because they reveal problems that already exist in the collective unconscious. Jung observed: “The bearer of superior perception becomes the repository for all that the group cannot consciously acknowledge about itself. This pattern explains why these individuals don’t just feel misunderstood, they feel systematically targeted by a force they can’t rationally explain.” ~Carl Jung

In the most recent months of my healing journey, piecing back together the “Soul fragmentation” that was a result of having been silenced (under a death threat) and isolated…forced to carry the deceptions of non-dual teachers…it was the Jungian teachings that provided some of the deepest and clearest answers as to “why?”

The following piece describes to a “T” what I experienced at SAT (The Society of Abidance in Truth) and the resultant, deliberate ‘character assassination’ (what some have called a “Soul murder”) at the hands of Nome when non-dual teachers made the deliberate decision to place the entire burden for their lies and deceptions on these shoulders…and the shoulders of my family.

⚛️ Character Assassination: https://integrityintruth.com/clarification-of-videos/character-assassination/

⚛️ The Tangled Web of Deception: https://leslieread.substack.com/p/the-tangled-web-of-deception

⚛️ The Cult of Radical Non-Duality:https://leslieread.substack.com/p/the-cult-of-non-duality

⚛️ The Mystery of Past Lives: https://leslieread.substack.com/p/the-mystery-of-past-lives

⚛️ A Message on Our Core Values: As-Above-So-Below: https://leslieread.substack.com/p/a-message-on-our-core-values

⚛️ The Existential Danger of Radical Non-Duality: https://leslieread.substack.com/p/the-existential-danger-of-radical

-Gratitude Carl Jung, Peter Brouwer and Caravaggio Bolo, via Facebook, for the following text excerpt.

Jung’s most dangerous discovery wasn’t about mental illness. It was about people who see everything others miss, and why this ability destroys them. In his clinical practice, Jung documented patients with what he called “differentiated perception.”

Individuals who could read micro-expressions, sense hidden emotions, and perceive psychological patterns that escaped everyone else. They saw through social masks, detected lies instantly, and felt the unconscious tensions in every room. Jung called this discovery “dangerous” because these people consistently ended up isolated, exhausted, and unable to maintain normal relationships.

Not because they were unstable, but because seeing everything came with a psychological cost no one understood. Today, I’ll show you Jung’s most dangerous discovery about people who see everything, and why he believed this rare ability either destroys you or transforms you into something extraordinary. The case that revealed Jung’s most dangerous discovery began with a patient he described in his private notes.

A highly introverted intuitive type who came to him in 1913 during Jung’s own psychological crisis following his break with Freud. This patient, representing what Jung would later categorize as the rarest personality type, possessed what he called “undifferentiated intuitive perception”.

She could walk into any room and immediately sense the psychological atmosphere: who was lying, who was in emotional pain, who harbored secret resentments. Jung wrote: “The patient displays an extraordinary capacity for perceiving unconscious contents in others, but this faculty appears to cause her considerable distress rather than advantage. She couldn’t engage in small talk because she saw through every social facade.

She couldn’t maintain friendships because people felt exposed and uncomfortable around her. She couldn’t hold employment because her presence disrupted the collective unconscious agreements that keep groups functioning. Jung realized he wasn’t treating pathology. He was observing what happens when the unconscious becomes too conscious, when perception becomes too differentiated for social survival. He documented her describing people with startling accuracy.

She speaks of others as if she has access to their private thoughts and hidden motivations. When I verify her observations through careful questioning, they prove remarkably accurate. This wasn’t psychosis or delusion. This was consciousness so advanced it had become socially dangerous. But Jung discovered something even more disturbing.

Because this patient’s extraordinary perception seemed impossible to explain, therefore Jung began investigating what he would later term “participation mystique”, the psychological phenomenon where individuals with highly differentiated intuition become overwhelmed by unconscious contents from others. Jung wrote in his Red Book period notes:

There are those among us whose psychic apparatus is so finely tuned that they absorb not merely conscious communications, but the entire unconscious atmosphere of their environment. Modern research by Dr. Elaine Aron on highly sensitive persons validates Jung’s early observations. Her research shows that roughly 20% of people have heightened sensory and emotional sensitivity.

But Jung identified something more specific within his psychological typology: the introverted intuitive type, comprising roughly 1% of the population, who don’t just feel deeply, but perceive unconscious patterns with startling clarity. Jung observed that these individuals have what he called “differentiated intuitive function”,

Their brains process not just obvious social cues, but unconscious emotional states, repressed content, and psychological patterns that others cannot detect. They see the depression behind forced smiles. They sense the desperation beneath confident presentations. They feel the collective shadow that groups unconsciously agree to ignore. Jung wrote: “The danger lies not in the perception itself, but in the psychic isolation it creates.

When one sees clearly what others cannot or will not see, one becomes a mirror that society cannot bear to look into. This creates what Jung called “the problem of the superior function”, when your greatest strength becomes your greatest burden because it separates you from collective unconscious participation. But Jung discovered the real danger wasn’t the perception itself,

Jung wrote in “Psychology of the Unconscious”:

Nothing has a stronger influence psychologically on their environment and especially on their children than the unlived life of the parent. But he discovered this principle extended to all relationships. When someone’s shadow is reflected back through another person’s clear perception, the unconscious mind has two choices: integrate the shadow or attack the mirror. Jung documented this pattern repeatedly in his clinical work.

The person who sees clearly gets blamed for creating the problems they’re merely observing. His patients with differentiated intuition experience this constantly. When they would gently suggest that someone seemed troubled, that person would explode at them for being negative or creating drama. When they’d express concern about obvious problems, they’d be accused of being judgmental or manufacturing issues where none existed.

Jung realized this wasn’t coincidence, it was psychological defense. In “Memories, Dreams, Reflections” he wrote: “Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves. But for most people, it’s easier to attack the person reflecting their shadow than to examine what’s being reflected. This creates what Jung called the scapegoat phenomenon.”

Highly perceptive individuals often become the designated problem in every group they enter, not because they cause problems, but because they reveal problems that already exist in the collective unconscious. Jung observed: “The bearer of superior perception becomes the repository for all that the group cannot consciously acknowledge about itself.”

This pattern explains why these individuals don’t just feel misunderstood, they feel systematically targeted by a force they can’t rationally explain. But Jung’s most disturbing discovery was still to come, because Jung observed that overwhelming perception manifested differently in different individuals. Therefore, he identified four distinct patterns within the introverted intuitive type, each representing a different way of processing unconscious contents from others.

For this complete article please refer to my note over on Substack by the same title: ⚛️ The Scapegoat Phenomenon…Involving Sensitive Souls and Empaths. https://leslieread.substack.com/p/the-scapegoat-phenomenon

Thank you for following my work in the unfolding of a complex karmic SoulCycle. It is my hope that these writings benefit you on your journey. Please feel to write me with any comments and/or questions. ❣️🙏🌷

Warmly,

-Leslie@integrityintruth.com

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The Existential Dangers of Pure Dis-Identification…

In a private (taped) session with one of my teachers (Russell Smith) I was told I would “fall through the cracks.”

At the time I had no idea what Russ was referring to. But, now, so much is clear regarding the deceptions, lies, systemic collusion and the over-arching occult (siddi) controls of Nome, Russell Smith and Candace O’Denver…hugely aided by Adyashanti, Gangaji, Bentinho and so many others in the non-dual community colluding in what is, undoubtedly, one of the largest (although, certainly, not the only) of existential breaches among so-called teachers of “truth.” 

While non-duality is a Fact-of-The-Universe…there are far too many teachers, who at the moment of an ‘awakening…whether via teachers/Gurus, NDE’s, the breathe or their own innate Presence…see the enormous possibilities of teaching before there has been any thorough integration of such an awakening.

As Nome used to say ‘There’s nothing to integrate.’ 

That said it all. It is precisely from this dis-embodied…completely dis-identified state of Radical Non-duality…that we see the unfortunate prevalence of such breaches as existential harm and, paradoxically, the control-over-the-lives-of-others. 

One of the biggest dangers of teachings of the unreality-of-the-body…ASIDE -from-the-fact that the sacred Body, itself, is the most efficacious portal into the transcendence of such!…is that the body is the Seat of sacred Presence and grounded-ness. Being…untethered from the body… creates a myriad of dualities, some of the most unfortunate showing up in the ungrounded lives and teachings of Neo-Advaita (contemporary non-dual) teachings.

In the words of Ken Wilber:

“Unless you are on a path that includes not only ‘waking up’…but ’growing-up’ AND ‘cleaning-up’…all 3-in-one package…you are going to get f**ked!!

You WILL end up in a bad…bad way because one of these is going to go sour.

That is THE major, unfortunate, path that the majority of people end up taking… and they end up wasting a life.”

Samadhi does not, of course, address (ANY) shadow elements…in some cases it makes it worse as there is pure dis-identification.

No doubt what has occurred in this life is arguably one of more horrific and existentially harmful examples of the harm that can occur when teachers have not done their own internal work.

The systemic deception within the non-dual community: ⚛️https://integrityintruth.com/systemic-collusion-in-the…/


Paul Selig’s message that this ‘was not intentional to me’ yet the existential controls were most definitely intentional to me: ⚛️https://integrityintruth.com/clarif…/the-move-to-portland/


The role of Adyashanti: ⚛️ https://integrityintruth.com/systemic-collusion-in-the…/


Letter to the ASI (The Association of Spiritual ‘Integrity’): ⚛️https://www.dropbox.com/s/hga3c7zpo1v973j/ASI%20Letter%2003%3A06%3A23.pdf?dl=0&e=1&fbclid=IwAR2hNCDCiHgzRQrXqce9WFFH5vgHGHoGlda3PUlGKT2n1qMuoFfoMadMbvs


You are your own healer: ⚛️ https://integrityintruth.com/you-are-your-own-healer/


(Photo image taken with an iPhone X in NW Portland) ⚛️https://integrityintruth.com/photo-gallery/

Thank you for following this blog. Your interest is so deeply appreciated. ❣️❧

Please feel free to contact me should you have anything to share related to this content or any questions: ⚛️ Leslie@integrityintruth.com

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Embodied Integration is the Birthplace of Integrity

“What we do to one, we do to the entire Web of Life.” ~Chief Seattle
(Chief of the Duwamish and Suquamish tribes)

What is integration? 

For those who say “I’m not the doer” and “nothing ever happens”…integration, paradoxically, means to ‘own your actions.’

Owning one’s actions is the beginning of on-going integration…and integrity. Without integrity (any) awakening is meaningless.

Four years-ago I began reporting on the lies I had been forced (under threat) to hold for non-dual teachers: Nome, Russell Smith and Candace O’Denver (who goes by a variety of aliases).

What were the lies?

The lies were in regard to the ‘supposed split’ of the teachings of the brothers Nome and Russell Smith and their formative connection with Candace O’Denver’s Great Freedom/Balanced View.

The supposed split (of the brothers) was a ruse.

When I returned to SAT (after being asked to leave ‘The Way of Sudden Awakening’) upon entering the SAT Satsang Hall there was Russell sitting on the dias next to Nome, looking sheepishly at me as I entered the hall. After that Sunday, Russell left and did not return during the remainder of my stay at SAT.

The deceptions of the purported animosity between the brothers…in order to convincingly ‘paint the picture’…was a deliberate ruse that was even taken into the Santa Cruz County court system.

These lies occurred in tandem with the coupling/marriage of teachers (primarily Nome and Sasvati, aka Judy Gilden) and their own projected fear that jealousy may ensue.

I (and by relation, my family) became the inadvertent ‘holder’ for the deceptive secrets of these teachers.

Because of that those teachers felt compelled to completely tear this life apart for the sole purpose of ensuring that their lies would never become public knowledge.

I (and by relation, my family) became the inadvertent ‘holder’ for their deceptive secrets. Because of that those teachers felt compelled to completely tear this life apart for the air-tight purpose of ensuring that their lies would never become public knowledge. So…I am forced (under threat) to hold the lies belonging solely to these teachers and for an un-embodied teaching I do not even believe in! Yes, non-duality is a ‘truth’ but without integrity it is (also) moot.

The systemic cover for these teachers/situation… occurring over this past decade+…includes many in ‘leadership’ and teaching roles in the ND spiritual community. This includes several far-reaching non-dual organizations such as SAND, BatGap and ASI.

Matt Licata succinctly described this situation as a ‘cosmic betrayal.’

It has not only been a process of my own unfolding and understanding but of a growing revelation as to the extent of complicity and collusion in what has become known as the “non-dual” community.

The dark underpinnings of control, corruption and collusion as they exist in the non-dual space are clearly evident as they played out in this complex dynamic, involving un-provable siddis (occult powers), that is, unless one uses names and photos painting a clear narrative that would be nigh impossible to fabricate.

As a loyal and devoted seeker I was the recipient of (way) more than my fair share of the ‘beneficial’ aspect of occult powers.

Having been the one who “fell between the cracks” (exact words of Russell Smith in a taped session) the burden for the lies of those teachers fell squarely…and solely…on these shoulders…and hence the literal waterfall of psychic control to ensure their lies would never become public knowledge.

Whether beneficial OR malevolent: both aspects of occult control look to remove the inherent sovereignty that is each-of-our birthright.

Portending that level of control were Nome’s own words from the early years:

“Just look at who it is you’re up against.”

Those words, alone, demonstrated Nome’s dedication to power over others.

It is no wonder there was such extreme existential control over this life.

The most notable alliance to Nome, et al, in the suppression of this story was/is the key support of Adyashanti (and the many involved in Open Gate) during the entire time. https://integrityintruth.com/bentinho-and-the-adya-connection/

It becomes my duty…if not Soul Mission…to bring light to this type of occult control and existential manipulation.

Unfortunately, I feel uniquely qualified to disclose where there has been…and continues to be…harm existing under the shroud of spiritual control.

 Fortunately, this marks the end of a karmic SoulCycle of having been silenced at the hands of spiritual teachers for being the holder of deceptive secrets.

This may not have been something I would have chosen.

There are times when Life chooses us for a particular job.

For this devotee to be speaking out so publicly the actions of the above-mentioned teachers would have had to be so extremely violative on the existential level.

Owning one’s actions is the beginning of on-going integration…and integrity. ❦

Thank you for your interest in this story.

Feel free to e-mail me with any questions at: Leslie@IntegrityInTruth.com ❦

An apt quote by Jeff Brown, author of numerous books including “Grounded Spirituality.”